Sunday, October 24, 2010


I think one of my medications said it could make your vision worse. Maybe two or three of them. That must be what is happening to me (since pure lack of sleep must certainly not be related at all) (nor would eyestrain from computer and television use).

It's SO exciting to feel like my appetite is getting better! And I actually started reading a long fiction book that wasn't just james harriot (not meaning his writing isn't excellent, but it can be enjoyed a chapter at a time like a bunch of short stories, thus it does not represent the same increase in non-depressed symptoms). And my brain sleeping at night! So my mouth was dry and I kept waking up because of that, but that's much different that being awake because my brain won't stop thinking.

Good days present their own challenge. Like I start thinking the next down turn is just about here (that probably could be a self-fulfilling prophecy). So it's just a thought. Maybe if I remember that it will help.

And I'm better at calling friends when I'm desperate, but I'm not desperate today, so I don't feel as justified in calling a friend. But technically it would be better to interact with friends when I am just slightly down instead of waiting until I'm considering going back to the hospital. :) Which I'm not considering right now. That was last week. I don't like that I need other people, yet I'm glad not to be alone. You'd think I was human or something.

1 comment:

  1. Glad you've been feeling a bit better :). As for the thinking about the next down turn, that sounds like just one more OCD trap! Like you said, thoughts are just that - thoughts. They don't necessarily have a certain meaning or truth just because they pop into our heads! My therapist would probably say something like stay in the present and deal with the future when it arrives; or, he might say something along the lines of expecting thoughts like that to pop up at times when you don't want them intruding. If you are prepared from them to pop up, you can greet them nonchalantly and indifferently when they do arrive, paying them no extra special attention and just move on with your day! OCD will soon learn that that trick isn't going to work anymore!