I now know why I shouldn't sleep thirteen and a half hours and then eat an inferior breakfast to my normal breakfast (the granola was gone and I didn't want oatmeal, so I came up with something else): the end result is me feeling exhausted. Of course, I'm not really repentful; that's thirteen and a half hours when I didn't have to think! The day is successfully shortened. The only problem is that now I feel like taking a nap (two hours after waking up).
time
I'm using up time. On purpose. There was a time when I thought time was practically worth money. Now I spend money to get through the time. Because I'm not worried about the time or the money (false: I'm worried about too little money and too much time). My main goal is not to give in to the latest, greatest (more than a year old) depression thought. Sometimes I wish I could pull out the thought and put it on the floor and stomp on it, or something like that. Wish I could. But, as I told someone yesterday, this is my life [right now]. And, as I agreed with someone else, I'm hangin' in there. I don't like Halloween. Because my depression is particularly intrusive on this day. And because I'm scared of some costumed teenagers "trick"ing me. The darkness at "trickortreat" time doesn't help. Probably the fact that my family hid from the trickortreaters doesn't help either. We used to celebrate Reformation Day on this day, in honor...
karin says:
ReplyDeleteI too love to sleep in as then i'm not dealing with ocd or worrying about how it might show up. I also think that dealing with ocd DOES make me tired, both with the energy used up in doing ERP tasks and in wondering how long before the next unintentional ocd thing is going to hit and how i will have to deal with it. Also then i don't see stuff that triggers the ocd thots which just means a happier day when i DO get up.
It's probably not a good idea to sleep overlong; i do understand the draw it has since i fall for it most of the time!