Thursday, June 30, 2011

this that and the other things I wanted to say

The computer isn't publishing my posts. Very irritating. But I'll go ahead and try a new one. My therapist told me to research something! Though she said it with much reserve. She just wants me to get to the bottom of the sinus/ear infections I keep getting. Aside from the fact that I work with kids.

I'm told that saline nasal washes are disgusting. I don't think so. Maybe because my idea of disgusting is having another child sneeze on my mouth, or (one of the worst), wiping my face on my shoulder after a child did that and before their snot dried. That is gross. Even the sneeze thing isn't such a big deal anymore. Those are probably "safe" germs. As in, the kind that give me sinus and ear infections, but are quite unlikely to kill me or even make me miss work (since I work sick when it's not too bad).

What can I say? Making pizzas a a grocery store did not cure my ocd at all. Choosing to keep working with children, that's like choosing many natural exposures. Well, germs weren't my biggest thing anyway, unless I'm the preparer/cook. Which reminds me, I still might freak out when they ask me to cook something at work. But telling tales of what children put in their mouth oh so peacefully (with no appearent negative results), that I can do.

The latest is this. A child found a piece of pancake from breakfast lying on the floor. I told her to put it in the garbage. She grinned. She pointed to the TV. I looked at the TV. I looked back and caught her just before she ate the pancake bite. Tricky. And still a toddler! (This is a case of the naughty child amusing me more than annoying me, which is convenient for them.)

Oh, no, this isn't posting. Sad.

I might have sort of lied. Oh, hi there, ocd? How've you been? I've seen you recently, haven't I? But you were worrying about... oh, another case of maybe possibly lying. Great. I'm sensing a pattern here...

(Oh, and I hate exposures for the lying fear.)

(And I avoid ERP as much as conveniently possible anyway.)

(Oh, and the lying fear was the one that lost me a job I really wanted a year and a half ago. Grrrr.)

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